Giving Up Mothering

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What is your most fervent prayer? Is it about your mothering? Is it still unanswered? Or do you celebrate God’s gift of that answered prayer every single day? Praise God, if that‘s your answer! Otherwise, join the crowd.

Mothering. The enemy is not just playing with our us. He has ONE purpose - to steal, kill and destroy. 3 Scripture to pray fervently for your children.

Imagine hearing one of your children question how can there be a god who would take his baby brother? Oh, by the way, that same young man lost five friends the year prior to losing his younger brother. His faith’s shaken to the very core of his being – and his beliefs.

May I ask a question?

Is that the reason folks turn away from God – deep pain? So often…

May I ask another question – How do you answer when you’re broken too?

Pain. Hurt. Despair. Yet buried in denial.

Am I talking about how I feel about his statement? Or how he himself feels? To state there is no god requires a hurt so deep, I can’t fathom it. Can you?

Let me backtrack a little. I used to joke that I’d be a successful mom IF 1) I got the boys to adulthood 2) without going to jail and 3) they loved the Lord God.

21 Words kill, words give life;
they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.
Proverbs 18:21 (MSG)

Oh, how our words create our world! I thought I was joking, yet poison spewed from my mouth unwittingly. What words are coming out of yours? Choose them wisely.

My older son called one night – from jail.

Strike 1. So there we sat in the jail waiting room under the sign stating who built it – the company my husband worked for. Yea, it was one of his buildings…

Then my younger son died.

Strike 2. Thank God he knew and loved the Lord!

And my older says he’s an atheist.

Strike 3.

So that self-definition of a good mother…How’s it holding up? It’s not. I’ve failed miserably by my own standards.

But God…

Calls me His own

What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are. But that’s also why the world doesn’t recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he’s up to. 1 John 3:1 (MSG)

Says He will save our children

24 Who can snatch the plunder of war from the hands of a warrior?
Who can demand that a tyrant let his captives go?
25 But the Lord says,
“The captives of warriors will be released,
and the plunder of tyrants will be retrieved.
For I will fight those who fight you,
and I will save your children.
Isaiah 49:24-25 (NLT)

And God tells me He loves me just like He loved:

  • Abraham, who slept with his slave woman, yet he fathered nations
  • Elijah, who hid from God, yet he called down fire from Heaven
  • King David, who was an adulterer and murdered, yet was a man after God’s own heart

So do I throw in the towel and give up on this “mothering” thing?

Would you? Or is that the stupidest question you have read in a long time? We know these children are ours for life! Do I owe it to my son to persevere in prayer for the salvation of his soul? No, yet I freely seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness for his sake – and mine.

I’m fighting the enemy for my son’s soul. I trust God as The Father of my son to save him as Isaiah 49:25 states. I also know only God can pierce a fiercely guarded heart and mind in ways I can’t begin to ask or imagine. So I love my son, genuinely.

I will continue to pursue Christ, to savor His word and to pray fervent prayers for my child…and yours!

It takes a village…Hillary had that right.

The enemy is not just playing with our children and us. He has ONE purpose – to steal, kill and destroy each one of us.

To steal our identity in Christ.
To kill our hope in the Lord.
And to destroy our God-given destiny.

Stand firm, then in the day of evil and armor up! Ephesians 6:10-20 And PRAY always…

In Jesus name. Amen

Mother taught me, “Can’t is a coward too lazy to try-and I’m NOT raising cowards.”

Yes you can, she would say. I agree. Yes, you and I can, for we can do all things through Christ Jesus.

Even though my son is now an adult, there is still much “mothering” left to do.

I’m not giving up mothering!

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37 thoughts on “Giving Up Mothering

  1. Praise God! You are a solid woman of faith! I could just hug you right now. These are powerful words and ones that I will soak in. I’m joining you in prayer!

  2. You did go deep! I am encouraged by your determination to cling to truth and to pray even in the ache.
    God gave mothers a mother’s heart to love her children in a way only a mother can. Thankfully, and it’s hard to imagine, God loves our children more fiercely than we do.
    May He give us all grace and strength as we strive to mother well.

    I’m visiting from FMF.

    1. Thank you Cheryl, for letting me know my words encouraged you! Yes, it is hard to imagine GOd’s infinite love for our children. Hugs, from my heart to yours,

  3. Susan…Mothering is definitely a lifetime commitment even when they are physically gone from our home. We still mother them by praying for them daily. Continue to hold your son in prayer for salvation. God is faithful. Thank you for being so transparent. Loved reading your post. Blessings. 🙂

    1. Naomi, thank you. What Joy Is Mine. LOVE the name of your blog and so appreciate your words to me. Yes, God is faithful. Blessings to you, too! Hugs, Susan

  4. It’s inspiring that with the hardships you’ve experienced that you haven’t give up and you find the strength to keep your visions in mind. You have a wonderful spirit and attitude! Thanks so much for sharing your story at Share The Wealth Sunday!

  5. Pingback: What If…
  6. Oh Susan, thank you, thank you for this powerful reminder of the truth. It means a lot right now (married to an unbeliever and unable to share my faith freely with my girls).

    I am so sorry for your deep loss and all the ache as a Mom. I’m someone who fled God for 20 years due to unaddressed pain…but I had a praying Mum and Dad and friends who kept believing…God never let me go…and He hasn’t let your son go either…He can’t see it now….but he will when God has prepared him for the unveiling and healing to come. Hugs to you as a Mom: so painful to watch.

    1. Anna, I don’t know if you will ever know just how deeply and profoundly your words are to me. Thank you – from my very core. I am praying for you and your family. Our prayers #AvailMuch. Standing on that truth from God’s own word, the Bible. Hugs, Susan

  7. I am praying with you, friend, for our hearts to stay strong! To keep calling on Jesus on behalf of our children. May we never feel defeated, and even more surely never give up! Thank you for this hope today! It is so good to visit here again and I’m so thankful we had the chance to meet in person last month! Next up – Declare!
    I’d love to invite you to my new link-up I recently launched, #MomentsofHope. I pray it is a place God saturates with His hope! And your posts are most definitely filled with HOPE!

    1. Oh Lori, I’m honored and will visit your linkup. It was FABULOUS to get to put the real person with the name last month. HOPE! Love that. Hugs, Susan

  8. Well said, Susan! Sadly, I think it can be so easy in our role as a mother to measure our worth by how well our kids manage life, God, etc. We can be so hard on ourselves as a result. Underneath I think we can feel so much pressure in our role. Thanks for this grace-filled honest look at an issue that we all face in one way or another no matter what is happening with our children themselves. Blessings on your weekend!

  9. Susan, thanks for the encouragement not to give up standing on God’s promises and praying for our children. (And husbands and other loved ones.) And for the encouragement to let our identity come from Christ, NOT our own perspectives. You live this out beautifully!

  10. Whew, Yes!! Take up that sword girl. I love your statement of power and resilience. I join you in prayer for your son, as well as, for all of our children. God, raise up a mighty generation!! So many blog articles I read around the net are sugar sweet, even-keeled teaching, crafty, witty, or Jesus painted pink….while they ALL have their place, some days a call to arms is in order! Your blog today is real and gushes angst and hope. Nobody warned me that motherhood is a battle field. We need fierce mamas in prayer, ready to come together. Thanks for leading the charge!

    1. Meg,
      Tears rolled when I read your comment. Thank you – we ARE fierce mommas, indeed! Blow the horns and CHARGE! Hugs, love you girl. Susan

  11. My children are still in the little years of childhood. Three kids soon to be seven or younger. These verses are so encouraging, and remind me of the importance of the seeds that I am planting daily

    This reminds me of the song I get on my knees/

    I get on my knees, I get on my knees
    There I am before the love that changes me
    See I don’t know how, but there’s power
    When I’m on my knees

  12. Susan, such a powerful message! Mothering can be so hard. The unexpected twists and turns can wear us down and make us want to give up. I love your determination….I’m not giving up! The enemy wants us to give up, because right on the other side of that pursuit to keep going is our breakthrough. Our miracle. I’m praying for your family and your son, believing God to send laborers and encouragers to speak life into him. Have a great weekend!!

    1. Oh Alisa, I treasure your prayers for Matt. God knows who, what, when, why and how – I just keep asking for it to be in “momma-time” Ain’t happening that way…yet God has a plan and a promise. Hugs! Susan

  13. Oh, Susan … Yes, deep today … deep hurts … but deep calls to deep and God meets us there. Thank you for being a faithful mother! I have a close family member who often calls the state “his home.” It is heartbreaking … Praying for that specific one in your family today–that God would reach him in the way that only He can. ((hugs))

  14. Oh, ((Susan)), my heart goes out to you, sister. Adding your son to my prayers. So thankful those prayers don’t fall on deaf ears, but on the ears of Power. This post lands in my inbox at the right time this morning, as I have swollen eyes, and was up most of the night worrying for my son. This mothering thing doesn’t get easy just b/c they get to be adults, does it? So, I say to myself as much as I say it to you this morning…Take Heart…He knows, He cares, and He’s able. ((Hugs to you, my friend)) <3

    1. Brenda, Hugs, hugs, hugs! Yes, momma-time and God’s timing differ, yet, His word and His promises remain constant. And our children, He WILL SAVE! It’s a promise. I’m adding your son to my prayers too. Susan

  15. Susan, I gain so much from these posts in which you open your heart and let us feel the reality of brokenness — and then rejoice in the healing and restoration that only God can do!

  16. Oh, Susan… So deep today. I won’t give up. Mothering is messy for me right now and I think I need to call in some reinforcements. But I won’t give up. Thanks for this dose of encouragment today! Sending hugs and butterflies your way! xo, liz

    1. Liz, yes, call in the reinforcements! God gave them to us for a reason. I’ll take every hug and every loving butterfly you send my way. Love ya! Susan

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